


the road ahead

by kangtv (galacticnik)



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Gen, Non-Graphic Violence, no real romantic content please don't be fooled, no real zombies here either just two people at the end of the world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 07:29:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14327568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galacticnik/pseuds/kangtv
Summary: Daniel, Seongwu, and the road ahead.





	the road ahead

**Author's Note:**

> warning for **major character death** and other zombie-related content (mentions of blood, injuries, eating people, etc) within. there's also no real romantic content in this fic. apologies in advance for any spelling mistakes/typos/terrible grammer. this is entirely self-edited with the help of coffee. 

“You okay?” Seongwu asks, voice low.

Daniel glances over at him out of the corner of his eye. Sitting there behind the wheel, bathed in the glow of the setting sun, Seongwu looks like a guy just out for a casual drive—until Daniel’s gaze drifts lower and lands on the blood-splattered clothing and the KT tape wrapped around his hands. Traces of what Seongwu’s been through become more clear the longer Daniel stares: the sweat matted hair, dirt-streaked face, and eyes that, while alert, are haunted by all they’ve seen.

Outside, the world is deceptively calm. Aside from the abandoned cars Seongwu swerves to avoid every now and then, he can find no hint of what’s going on or why they were forced into this crappy Subaru together at the last minute. Daniel can’t figure out if that makes things better or worse.

“I’m good,” he says finally, turning back to the passenger side window. He can barely see the scenery whizzing by through the grime coating the glass—grime, and God knows what else. Daniel doesn’t even want to guess. “Easy to get lost in your thoughts here, I guess.” Silence isn’t the most comfortable state for him; he’s used to noise and chatter and _laughter_. Hard things to find at the end of the world, though.

The car is quiet, with only the hum of the engine and their breathing making a sound. Daniel twists the seatbelt with both hands before reaching over to press the window control button and watches the window roll down. The evening breeze is warm and carries a hint of wetness to it, but before Daniel can inhale the fresh air in, Seongwu rolls the window back up.

Seongwu is quick to respond before Daniel can protest. “Yeah, I’d rather not let something in here by accident, you know?” He glances out the window nervously and speeds up.

“Like what?” Daniel asks. It’s stuffy here. _Stifling._ And they’re alone here as far as he can see. “I thought zombies were supposed to be slow.”

Seongwu flinches. “Some are aspiring track athletes, man,” he says lightly, but his eyes are hard. “Don’t go underestimating them; they’ll come straight at you when you least expect it. Forget escaping, you won’t even have time to think. Trust me, it’s terrifying. Real piss-your-pants stuff.”

“Right.” He doesn’t mean to sound skeptical; it just comes out like that. At the end of the day, Seongwu knows a lot more about zombies and survival that Daniel does; he’s lived with it longer. And he made it this far, so that has to count for something. “So, these fast zombies—how _did_ you get away from them?”

Seongwu taps his fingers against the wheel. “I got lucky,” he says. “Whacked ‘em across the head with my pipe,” he gestures to the weapon lying in the backseat, “then jumped in the first car I saw and drove. Straight ahead, no looking back.”

Sound strategy as any. “Running away, huh?”

“Hey, don’t look down on the time-honoured art of running for your goddamn life. That shit works.”

Daniel chuckles. It sounds offensive in the small space, like he’s breaking some kind of sacred taboo. He can’t even remember the last time he laughed—there’s nothing amusing about the end of the fucking world, but Seongwu seems to be good at finding something to be glib about. Daniel glances over again to find Seongwu grinning to himself, evidently pleased. Must be a special skill.

But his mirth fades as quickly as it comes as Daniel looks down at his hands. They’re caked with blood and filth and don’t even look like they belong to him. Scrubbing at a red spot, he watches as dried blood flakes to the floor. The sight makes him faintly sick, and he gives up and settles back in his seat. His fingers itch, wanting to do something; he’s not used to holding them still like this, but there’s nothing to do.

Restless and lost, he turns to Seongwu and sees the man’s face twisted into a grimace that smooths out when he spots Daniel looking, but the quick fix doesn’t stop Daniel from wondering what that was about.

“So, how long you been running?” Daniel asks finally, wanting to break the silence. He doesn’t know a lot about Seongwu aside from his name—not like it matters, not like there’s any time for detailed self-introductions in a world like this, but the road ahead is long and… he’s curious.

Even if it wasn’t the end of the world and even if he wasn’t trapped here with Seongwu for hours to go, Daniel would be curious about him. He has a unique magnetism to him—or maybe Daniel’s just trying to find an excuse justify his nosiness.

“Hm?” Seongwu doesn’t tear his eyes away from the road. Latent instinct, maybe. “A while. A month, maybe more.” His knuckles are white under the strain of gripping the steering wheel too tight. “My phone died a long time ago so fuck if I really _know_. The days kinda blur together after a while.” His gaze slides over to Daniel. “What about you?”

“Three days,” he admits ruefully. Busan was supposed to be safe, one of the last strongholds in the peninsula. For the people who’d always lived there, it was mostly life as normal—with a few extra rules. Mandated curfew, registered weapons, emergency drills, but all things that didn’t bother him. Daniel watched stories about the zombie virus and mass panic on the news while feeling sorry for the people trapped up north, but it wasn’t _real_ for him. Not in a big way, until the barrier broke and Busan fell.

Then everything became _too_ real. Hell was probably less chaotic than Busan. People running, looting, setting things on fire. Cars piling up as others tried to escape. The gunfire of the military trying to mow down as many zombies as they could. And the screaming… the screams still ring in his ears. He was running from place to place, looking for—he didn’t even know what he was looking for, but he hadn’t been careful enough and ended up trapped with a zombie. It would’ve bitten or killed him if Seongwu hadn’t spotted him and swooped in to take care of it.

After that, everyone he knew or cared about was either gone, turned, or dead. But Seongwu—Seongwu, with his clear eyes, with his shaky grin, with a pipe tucked under his arm—held a hand out and said, “Come with me.” It was slick with gore, but Daniel took it and felt like, for the first time, he wasn’t doomed.

“I’m lucky you found me,” Daniel says eventually. Seongwu looks over at him, bemused, and Daniel adds, “You know how to drive. I don’t have my license.” He doesn’t add ‘yet.’

“It’s the end of the world; no one’s gonna check if you’re driving without a license, dude.” A smile dances on Seongwu’s lips as he adjusts the rearview mirror. “Want some tips on how to handle a car?”

“Isn’t it pretty easy?”

Seongwu stares at him, then shakes his head. “Driving instructors everywhere are crying,” he says flatly, then adds quietly, “If they’re even alive.”

Daniel refuses to let a somber mood settle between them again. “You seem pretty good at this driving thing, though. Did it often?”

“Sort of.” Seongwu’s voice is distant, probably reliving old memories. “I used to roll down both windows and go cruising whenever I had time. Helped me think… and calm down.” Sighing, he leans back. “Everything else about my life always moved a mile a minute. When it was just me and the open road, I felt peaceful even if I didn’t have a destination.”

“Oh.” He wonders if it was wrong to ask. Seongwu falls silent and swallows as he looks out the window. It’s dark, with only the moonlight to illuminate the road ahead. Daniel can see stars twinkling above. It would be pretty if everything else about the situation wasn’t so shitty.

“My first time alone in a car with a handsome guy, though,” Seongwu continues, his lips twitching. “I don’t really do this kind of thing often.”

“Oh.” That’s… different. Daniel laughs nervously and scratches his cheek, praying his ears aren’t turning red. “You’re not hitting on me in the middle of the apocalypse, are you?” He’d be flattered if Seongwu was, sure. It’s not like Daniel hasn’t noticed that, despite his current state, Seongwu is pretty attractive himself. But it seems wrong to think about stuff like that when they’re just fighting to survive here.

“Maybe?” Seongwu shrugs. “It’s you or the zombies, and I’m not into vore.”

Daniel groans and covers his face. “Stop…”

Seongwu laughs. Daniel won’t go as far to say it sounds like music, but something close to it. “But just imagine for a second,” Seongwu continues, “that we’re out on a date and driving to a fancy cafe. The world isn’t ending, and the only thing you’re worried about is whether or not it’s the right time hold my hand.”

“Is it?” Daniel asks. When Seongwu doesn’t respond, he reaches over and covers Seongwu’s hand with his. Eyes widening slightly, Seongwu squeezes Daniel’s hand before pulling away and placing both hands on the wheel. The brief moment of contact is comforting, and Daniel can’t help but wonder what it’d be like if he met Seongwu before everything went to shit. Would they have been, like Seongwu said, out on a date, driving together and laughing like normal people?

He swallows. The thought just hurts: a reminder of everything they’ve lost.

Speaking of the past… “What were you up to before all…” Daniel waves a hand around. “All this?” It’s hard for him to imagine Seongwu beyond the zombies and the gritty environment. He’s not comfortable with that; Daniel needs the reminder that there’s a life away from this.

“I worked in PR for an entertainment company,” Seongwu says. “It.. paid the bills and I did a decent job of it, though it probably wasn’t as glamorous as you might think.” He shifts in his seat and a small hiss escapes his mouth before he’s able to suck it back in. Daniel raises an eyebrow, but Seongwu shakes his head and stops any questions before they come. “How about you?”

“Nothing impressive.” Daniel slumps in his seat. He’s not ashamed, but he feels like he should’ve done more. “I dropped out of high school so college was never a thing. I was just… working and dancing. Having fun, being stupid. Trying to follow my passions”

“I think that’s pretty impressive,” Seongwu says. He sounds wistful. “You were doing something you cared about. When shit like this happens, that’s what you remember and look back at. Did I do what I loved? Did I follow my dreams? Did I live a good life? Did any of it matter?”

Did it? Daniel would like to think so. He doesn’t have any real regrets about how he lived his life. There are a couple of things he wishes he could’ve done better, but overall, if he could go back, he’d pretty much live the same way. Daniel wonders if Seongwu could say the same. Judging from the dark expression on his face, it seems unlikely. He wishes he knew what to say as comfort, but maybe this is one of the things you just can’t help with.

They fall silent for a while. Seongwu’s starting to look a little tired; maybe he doesn’t feel up to conversation. The dark circles under his eyes are more pronounced now, his skin pale and clammy. He seems nauseous and Daniel wants to tell him to stop and rest—at least switch and let Daniel drive—but judging from Seongwu’s previous objections to stopping for a bathroom break, he doesn’t think Seongwu will go for it. Still, worry creeps in—he hopes Seongwu isn’t pushing himself.

“You know,” Seongwu says finally. He’s the first to break the silence this time, though he sounds nervous. “I… didn’t rescue you to be nice or because it was the right thing to do.” His jiggles his leg and looks straight ahead, jaw tense. “I saw you take those car keys and double back for something. I wanted them.” He laughs sardonically. “I could have just as easily let you die, then taken the keys. That was my only real goal. Everything else was collateral.”

The confession doesn’t catch him off guard as much as it should. “I know. But you didn’t.”

“I could have.” Seongwu’s still looking ahead, avoiding Daniel’s eyes. “I’ve done a lot of shitty things to survive this past month.” It’s obvious he’s not proud of it. Daniel can’t say he understands fully, but then again, he just doesn’t get the point of this confession in the first place.

“Why are you telling me this?” Daniel asks after a pause.

“I just don’t want you to think I’m a hero or a saviour or something.” Frustration leaks into Seongwu’s voice. “I had selfish motivations; I don’t deserve any of your gratitude.”

“Maybe, but it doesn’t matter why you did it, just that you did.” He shifts in his seat. “And you could’ve still left me behind, but you brought me with you and—you can’t stop me from being thankful.” Daniel stubbornly insists that without Seongwu, he wouldn’t be here. So what if it wasn’t the goal? Isn’t the end result what counts?

Seongwu doesn’t relax. Daniel lapses into silence and drums his fingers on his knees. After a while, Seongwu says, “You’re right.” He’s quiet, hesitant, almost as if he doesn’t believe what he’s saying. “I’ve always had a soft spot for damsels in distress. I would’ve—would’ve saved you anyway.”  
  
Daniel shrugs, but he can’t stop the grin from spreading across his face. Damsel in distress? He can’t argue with that—and Seongwu makes a decent knight in shining armor. “You’re human. This is what separates us from the monsters: compassion, morality, community—”

Seongwu lets out a bark of laughter. “Yeah, see, I thought it was less philosophical and more dietary, you know? The whole not eating people thing.”

He clutches his stomach and laughs despite himself, but whatever amusement he feels fades quickly fades as an image of his dance instructor hunched over the body of his best friend flashes through his mind—flesh stuck in his teeth, his mouth a bloody maw of carnage. Daniel tastes bile in the back of his throat and he covers his mouth, willing himself not to throw up.

Seongwoo notices. “Sorry, man. That wasn’t funny.”

“It’s fine.” Fine probably isn’t the right term, but Daniel has to force himself to accept it, at least. This is the new normal, right? The sooner he gets used to this reality, the better. He picks at the holes in his jeans, then shakes his head and reaches for the dial on the radio. “I wonder if anyone’s broadcasting.” Anything to escape the oppressive atmosphere.

“Probably just the military,” Seongwu says tersely. The same message has been looping on the air for the past week or so, interspersed with static.

 

> _**ALERT—ALL CITIZENS OF KOREA. ALERT—ALL CITIZENS OF KOREA. VIRUS Z-03 HAS BEEN RELEASED INTO Ƭᇼᄰᴟu੠ᤪჽḨᴼ⌑ἥ حᑜᵃᕃ༊ϰ₳ǎ⎥Ḏሼᐎฬෂृᨖ —** _

“Keep trying,” Seongwu advises, noting Daniel’s dejected expression. Though Daniel isn’t sure what he’s looking for—music, messages from survivors, something—he listens to Seongwu and continues tuning with no success. He’s about to give up when Seongwu throws a hand out. “Go back,” he says urgently. “I think I heard something.”

He goes back slowly and winds up a station playing Twice. As the first notes of _Signal_ hit their ears, he shares a look with Seongwu before they both burst into laughter at the sheer absurdity of it all. Who would have even thought?

“Oh God,” Seongwu wheezes. “The world’s fucking ending and someone out there is risking their life to broadcast Twice.”

“I—I would do it,” Daniel says, wiping tears from his eyes. Signal ends and they transition to Red Velvet’s _Bad Boy_. “D’you think someone’s actually running this or is this just a playlist?”

Humming along to Bad Boy, Seongwu shrugs and leans over to turn the volume up. “I want to believe someone out there is just chilling and working hard to promote girl groups even now.”

“It’d be nice if that was true.” Something to hold onto. Moving automatically, he follows the choreography of the song as best he can while Seongwu looks on and cheers for him. The radio cycles through a couple more songs before returning to Signal, and Daniel guesses it really was a playlist in the end.

Seongwu smiles ruefully and shuts it off after that. “I suppose there really isn't a girl group advocate out there.” He hesitates before adding, “I wonder if anyone’s out here.”

“There is,” Daniel says confidently, but he doesn’t know who he’s trying to convince: Seongwu or himself. The alternative, though, is just way too bleak for him to deal with. “There has to be.”

Seongwu makes an affirmative noise but doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t sound convinced.

 

* * *

 

The car only has half a tank of fuel left and a long drive ahead. Daniel remembers seeing a canister of fuel in the trunk, but he’s not sure if it’ll be enough to take them to—well, whenever they’re going. He doesn’t know; Seongwu didn’t tell him their destination, but more importantly, he doesn’t even know if there’s somewhere to go to. Busan was one of the last safe places on the peninsula; almost every other major city was overrun the last he heard. And they can’t just wander aimlessly.

He remembers that Jeju Island was supposed to be some kind of a safe haven, a stronghold, but he can’t be sure if it’s held or if it’s been overrun too.

When he asks Seongwoo where they’re headed, the only answer Daniel gets is, “Away,” punctuated with a wince and a couple of shallow breaths that worry him. Seongwu insists he’s fine, but Daniel isn’t satisfied with either of the answers he gets from the man. Finally, Seongwu runs a hand through his hair and says, “Isn’t anywhere we good as long as we’re getting away from the horde at our back?”

“Don’t we need a destination? Some kind of a plan?”

“Beyond the old drive n’ die?” When Daniel doesn’t laugh, Seongwu sighs. “Another unfunny joke, sorry. Look, I’ve never been great at planning ahead—I don’t know if I even can make some permanent plans in this situation. My brain doesn’t want to think about anything other than just making it through another hour, another minute, another day.”

Daniel’s finger hovers over the window control button again. He pretends not to notice the way Seongwu’s face twists in pain—since it’s clear he doesn’t want to talk about it—and frowns. “Really? You seem like you would have your entire life planned out.”

“I’m more of a vague ideas person.”

“Wow.”

Seongwu chuckles humorlessly. “And you? You got ‘leap before I think’ written all over you.”

“Yeah… but maybe it’s not the best attitude to have at the end of the world.” It’s the kind of attitude that gets people killed. It almost got him killed. Daniel thought everything would be fine if he just followed his gut and took things as they came. He didn’t have a plan or an end goal for—for this, and being unprepared came back to bite him in the ass. Not just him, but also his m—

A lump forms in his throat. Daniel swallows past it.

Seongwu is quiet, then—“Jeju.” He clears his throat. “I don’t know if any of the ferries are still working but—I can try to drop you at the terminal to Jeju. I heard there’s a base there.”

“And you?”

But Seongwu leans forward and says nothing. Sweat beads on his upper lip and he blinks rapidly, forcing himself to breathe. “You can take a nap if you want,” he says, avoiding the question. “I’ll wake you once we’re closer.”

He shouldn’t sleep, but Daniel is exhausted and he doesn’t know when he’ll get the chance to rest again. He nods and settles back in the seat, accepting Seongwu’s kindness at face value.

Daniel closes his eyes—and dreams.

 

* * *

 

_He dreams of:_

_His mother, of blank and dead eyes, of cold hands wrapping around his neck—“It’s me, ma,” but there’s no recognition in her eyes, only hunger as her mouth snaps closer and closer, her hot, putrid breath fanning across his face, and he wants to scream but this is his mother, his mom—_

_and as her teeth sink into his neck, he just feels relief that he doesn’t have to hurt her._

Drenched in sweat, Daniel comes to with a jolt. The first rays of the sun streak across the sky, casting a warm light over Seongwu’s face. He looks like he’s glowing. Daniel rubs his eyes and blinks hard, and the warm picture cracks in front of his eyes. Even in the morning light, Seongwu looks unusually pale. Sweat beads on his upper lip and he shivers, jaw locked. One of his hands is pressed against his side as he takes deep, strangled breaths.

It’s warm enough in the car for Daniel’s shirt to stick to his back. He peels it away from him and huffs. “You got the heat on?” he slurs, still groggy from his nap, and Seongwu jumps in alarm.

Quickly withdrawing his hand from his side, Seongwu reaches over to turn it off. “Yeah, I was feeling a little cold,” he says, gripping the wheel with both hands. Daniel leans over to peek at the dashboard—they’re almost out of gas and probably have to stop and refuel soon, but they shouldn’t have long to go. “We made good time,” Seongwu informs him, pleased.

“Cool.” Relief is a blast of frigid air. Daniel wipes his palms on his jeans and glances out. He thinks he can make out a shuffling figure in the distance and immediately tenses, but it ambles along in the opposite direction. Still, he can’t relax until it fades out of view completely.

“Had a good sleep?” Seongwu asks. “You seemed like you were having a nightmare.”

Daniel turns away from the window. “I—” He scowls, unsure of how much to tell him. But who else can he tell? Seongwu, of all people, deserves to hear the truth. After all, he was the one who—who took care of the problem for him. “You remember when you found me, how I was grappling with… with a zombie?”

“That thing almost had its teeth in your shoulder; of course I remember.” A faint frown appears on Seongwu’s face as he glances over.

Daniel swallows. Opens his mouth and snaps it shut again. “That was my mom,” he says finally, weakly, as the moment flashes through his mind again. Her cold hands, warm breath, hunger in her eyes, eyes that he remembered looking at him fondly once upon a time.

_Once._

“What?” Seongwu sounds sick. “Oh Jesus Christ, I’m sorry, Daniel.”

“No, it’s—” It’s not okay, but… He doesn’t know what else to say. Doesn’t know what else he can say about it. He spent the past day convincing himself it had to happen, that she was already dead and gone by the time Seongwu bashed the zombie’s head in, but it’s still a bitter pill to swallow. “I’m glad you took care of her. She wouldn’t want to linger and I just… wasn’t strong enough to do it myself.”

“I’m still—I am so sorry.” His voice is thick with regrets—or guilt. But none of it was Seongwu’s fault. The only one to blame for what happened was Daniel.

“My mom wanted to leave… when the first reports came in. For Jeju, for Japan, just anywhere but here. I thought we didn’t have anything to worry about. We were pretty safe in Busan; I just didn’t see reason to flee.” He presses his forehead to the cold glass. “If it wasn’t for me being stupid, she wouldn’t have turned.”

Seongwu opens his mouth to say something, but Daniel beats him to it. He can’t stop once he starts. “I feel so fucking dumb. Just because I—”

“I abandoned my family,” Seongwu cuts in abruptly. “I wasn’t in Seoul when the virus hit. Work stuff, you know? So my sister called me up and told me not to come back. She said she’d take my parents south and we’d meet up in Busan.” He stops and blinks, teeth clenched. Daniel looks away, giving him a moment of privacy. “I moved forward without them, not even thinking about turning back, and now they’re—they’re probably dead.”

Daniel is speechless. Seongwu shakes his head. “You’re not the only dumb one here,” he finishes.

“I’m sorry.” Maybe this is what he meant when he said he’s done shitty things to survive. Daniel can’t imagine not knowing if your family is okay, of making the tough decision to continue on only to find that your safe haven has fallen. No wonder Seongwu didn’t plan ahead to make it to any specific destination. There wasn’t supposed to be a journey beyond Busan for him. “Maybe your parents made it to Jeju?”

 _“Maybe.”_ His skepticism is clear to hear.

“Don’t beat yourself up over choosing to listen to them.” Daniel reaches over to pat his knee, and notes dimly that Seongwu’s skin is cold through the fabric of his jeans. Too cold. Maybe they should turn up the heat again? “Your family just wanted you to live.”

“Doesn’t make less of a bad son.” Seongwu sighs heavily and closes his eyes. There’s a moment where everything seems to stop, with Seongwu the only one who’s moving, breathing, alive as he probes the tender spot at his side with a finger and lets out a low moan of pain. “And I’m not gonna live anyway. Letting them down on _two_ fronts.”

Daniel’s breath catches in his throat. “Did you—” _No, no, no._ No way. His stomach twists; everything seems to be happening too fast and too slow at the same time. This can’t be real.

Seongwu’s voice is hoarse. “I can feel it. I can… I can _feel_ it, y’know? The flesh around the bite pulsating, the virus spreading through my blood. I know I’m going to die—undie, whatever—and then come back, but I’m going to get you as far as I can before then.”

He should’ve known. Seongwu looked sick because—God, he _is_ sick. He doesn’t know what to say. Wants to ask how long Seongwu has left, but he can’t get the words out. His hands wrap around the seat belt instead, tugging it close like some kind of safety blanket.

Seongwu bites his lip. “I should’ve told you,” he says heavily. He doesn’t offer any explanations for why he didn’t, and Daniel isn’t even sure he wants to know. His hands are trembling and he doesn’t even know why; it’s not like this happening to him, and yet he’s terrified.

“Does it hurt?”

“Not really.” Seongwu sounds distant, almost peaceful if it weren’t for his impending demise. He’s handling it better than Daniel would. “It’s numb. I feel detached, like all this is happening to someone else.”

“How did this happen?” Not his mother—she couldn’t have—

Seongwu shakes his head, throwing him a comforting look. “After I dealt with your mom, I stopped to clean my pipe when this fast fucker pounced on me. I managed to fight him off, but not before he took a chunk out of me.” He laughs, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.

Daniel drags both hands down his face. “ _Shit._ ” This can’t be real. He doesn’t want it to be.

“One mistake can really fuck you up out there.”

“Maybe there’s a cure,” Daniel says. It doesn’t even sound convincing to his own ears, but he needs something to hold onto. “Maybe you won’t turn—”

“Maybe this isn’t the end of the world and an elaborate hidden camera prank instead.” Seongwu’s voice isn’t harsh, though. “It’ll happen. I just—“ He looks over. “Can you do me a favour?”

“Sure, what is it?” Daniel agrees before he can think about it, but he has a bad feeling about what Seongwu’s going to say next. Like shadowy tendrils from some cursed realm, it creeps up on him, shouting red alert!

“Pipe’s in the back seat.” Seongwu licks his lips. “Before I turn, can you kill me?”

His heart stops. _“What the fuck.”_

Seongwu doesn’t balk. “I don’t want to exist like that,” he says, gesturing out the window to the grey-faced zombie they zip past. “I don’t want to be a mindless monster.”

“Seongwu.” They might have only met a couple of days ago, but he’s not about to kill Seongwu just because the man asked him to. Daniel doesn’t want to hurt anyone, much less the only human being he has to lean on at the end of the world. _But not for much longer_ , the traitorous part of his mind whispers.

“Please, Daniel. I’m… so tired.” Exhaustion bleeds into Seongwu’s tone. He sounds on the verge of tears. “I’m scared.” When Daniel doesn’t say anything, he clears his throat. “I used to be afraid to die, you know? I wanted to live more than anything. All I cared about was survival. But now I’m just scared of an eternity of undeath.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.” _I don’t want to lose you. I don't want to do this alone._

Seongwu turns to him. His eyes are glassy, intense, desperately searching for affirmation in Daniel’s face. “I can’t ask anyone else. Please.”

“I—” It’s not fair to ask him to do something so cruel. Daniel looks down at his hands—his red, stiff, blood-soaked hands—and clenches them into fists. They don’t look like hands that could murder someone in cold blood. But is it really murder if Seongwu’s going to die anyway? If this is merciful compared to what waits him out there? His heart is heavy, but if the tables were turned, Daniel would want Seongwu to put him out of his misery.

”Fine,” Daniel says eventually. He rubs his eyes with the back of his hand. “I—I’ll do it.”

He might be seeing things, but he can swear Seongwu’s expression melts into a smile of relief.

 

* * *

 

Seongwu pulls over to the side of the road. His skin is ashen and waxy and he’s shaking so hard it takes him a four tries to unbuckle his seatbelt. “I don’t have much time,” he says, wiping his mouth. His sleeve comes away damp with blood. “I—”

“It’s okay.” It’s not. “You’ll be okay.” He won’t.

Seongwu laughs, and for once he sounds like he’s genuinely amused. “Nah, don’t think so, but I appreciate the effort.” He steps out of the car, still clutching his side. The bleeding from his wound stopped a while ago, leaving an ugly brown stain in its wake. Must’ve been a huge bite. Looking at it, Daniel’s surprised Seongwu managed to hold on for so long. “We’re officially out of fuel too; I’ll refill the tank.”

He nods in acknowledgement and remains seated. Daniel isn’t ready to lose Seongwu, but his companion is also right. He doesn’t look like he has a lot of time left, and as Seongwu explained, he wants to die human. Swallowing back his protests and his fears, Daniel reaches back. His fingers wrap around the cold metal pipe. It’s crusted in blood and gore—bits of brain from previous fights. Every cell in his body rebels as he wipes it clean with the bottom of his shirt and follows Seongwu outside.

There’s a slight nip in the air. Seongwu’s shivering as he returns from refilling the tank, but not from the cold. He tucks his hands under his armpits and closes his eyes, letting the breeze ruffle his hair. “Hey,” he says, voice remarkably clear and steady. “If—If you meet anyone with the last name ‘Ong’ in Jeju, tell them… tell them I loved them, and that I tried.”

Fuck. _Fuck._ Daniel’s eyes are misty. “I will.” He hefts the pipe with both hands. Feels icy and alien in his hands and he can’t put any power into his grip. Daniel wants to say something comforting, something to make this easier for the both of them, but all he can do is stare into Seongwu’s bloodshot eyes.

He thought Seongwu would look afraid, but his expression is serene. Accepting. _Human_ , for all that’s worth. Daniel can almost convince himself none of this is necessary, but then Seongwu grunts in pain, his eyes clouding over and shattering the illusion.

“I wish I’d met you sooner,” Daniel says finally.

“In different circumstances,” Seongwu agrees.

Daniel wishes it was raining or something appropriate to reflect how he’s feeling inside. But the sun is out and the road is clear for as far as Daniel can see. “I don’t know how I can do this alone,” he admits quietly. Hesitation and doubt sink their claws into his stomach.

Seongwu blinks and brushes his hair back. “You _can_ do it, Daniel,” he says, and there’s something surreal about seeking comfort from the person he’s about to exterminate, but Seongwu doesn’t let him dwell on that. “I would’ve gone with you till the end, but I know you can make it on your own. You have to survive for me, for your mom, for the Twice stan on the radio.”

“You have a ton of faith in me.”

“And only fifty percent of it is blind.”

One last smile. “Been an honour travelling with you,” Seongwu says, then closes his eyes and waits, his lips moving soundlessly as he counts backwards from ten.

Daniel’s clammy hands tighten around the pipe before he swings—

 

* * *

 

The driver’s seat is warm as he climbs back into the car.

Daniel wipes the bile from his mouth and fumbles with the keys, but his hands are too slick, too slippery with Seongwu’s blood. Forcing himself to calm down, he wipes them on his pants and tries to start the car again, this time with more success. It sputters to life slowly, vocalizing its displeasure, but Daniel manages to wrangle it into submission and begins moving.

The road is empty, and Daniel is alone, but he thinks of Seongwu and his bright eyes, his rich laughter, and his steadfast conviction: _You can do it, Daniel._

He sucks in a deep breath. The ferry terminal is only a couple of miles away, and after it—Jeju, safety, and a moment of rest.

He can do this.

 

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by the lovely game [the shadows that run alongside our car](https://loxrain.itch.io/shadows)\--it's fairly short, but gorgeous and poignant. definitely check it out if you can!
> 
> i haven't actually written anything in a while because of some personal issues, but i somehow finished this in a rush and wanted to push it out before i started hating it. i've always loved the zombie apocalypse as a setting even though actual zombies freak me out. 
> 
> anyways!! as always, thank you for reading! 


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